I smell an Oscar.

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I got a "Get Out of Jail Free" card last night and let me tell you, it was so worth it. My sister-in-law is new to this "Get Out of Jail Free" stuff, so I was so glad that she used it on this movie. Papa Pitt really did good on this film. Cate Blanchett was, as usual, fantastic. And this movie was the best I've seen in a while. So Moms if you are reading this and thinking that you need a night out, go see this movie! You will not be sorry, in fact, think of it as a little post-holiday gift to yourself. It's not too dramatic, it's not silly, and it doesn't have Jennifer Aniston in it. Which make it a definite "Must See". Oh and also, I don't care if (yawn) Marley and Me beat The Curious Case of Benjamin Button in box office sales, you won't be seeing Aniston or the dog on the red carpet this awards season.

A little HO! HO! HO!

I found this on youtube and thought it was funny. Turn of my playlist to enjoy....



Merry Christmas! HO! HO! HO!

No I am not in AA. I just use it for the prayer.

"God grant me the serenity

To accept the things I cannot change,

The courage to change the things I can,

And the wisdom to know the difference."


So, normally I don't like to talk about faith or God, however, I would like to tell you a little bit about what "The Serenity Prayer" means to me. First, I am not an addict. But, when my sissy and I saw Rachel Getting Married, (which you must see because it kicks ass), during one of her meeting scenes they are saying this prayer and I was totally moved my its words and how it can be applied to my life as a mom or wife. I've heard it before, but never really listened to what it means.

I know that I complain about my husband and son and how they drive me crazy, but I really do love them and I guess I can be a bit rigid and I know that I just need to let it go.

What I am suggesting, I guess, is for all of us, control freaks out there, to make a deal that this new year, 2009, be a year of serenity to:

"...accept the things I (we)cannot change,

The courage to change the things I (we) can,

And the wisdom to know the difference."

I'm all for getting involved in your kid's lives, but ladies quit while you're ahead.

My sister works for a huge retail store and like most people who have worked the service industry, we have heard it all. If you've worked at a restaurant, we know about allergic reactions, there is no need to go into to detail about swelling, order your damn food and get out. If you've worked at a hair salon, we know if you've used cheap dye. If you've worked in a doctor's office we know what an emergency is and we know that if you are really sick you will take whatever appointment we can give you, no matter if it interferes with little Sally's tap lessons. And if you have worked retail, we have definitely seen and heard it all.

However, one thing I have never heard is "Before I check out, let me call my daughter's friend to make sure she will like this one". WTF? Since when is it okay for moms to act like her daughter's friends are her friends? If anything she should call another mom to make sure, not her friend directly. I'm sorry lady, but you belong on a list for the socially retarded. It is never cool for moms to break the code of teenagers*. (**Code of Teenagers: Parents are not your friends.**)If it's the wrong one, oh well, most teenagers think their moms are crazy and wouldn't be surprised if you screwed up her holiday wish list.

My point is give your kids some space, let them have a private life, and secretly keep tabs on them, the old fashioned way. Spy on them, listen to them when they are talking to you, or just talk to the other moms. Give them space, but if suspect your kid is a big hoe bag, or a druggie, of course you should intervene, but seriously ladies, if you think your a cool hip mom, it doesn't matter how new your boobs are, or how old your surgeon told you you look, you are still a mom and they are still just kids. Get your own friends your own age, Dena Lohan(s)!

Our KID-FREE Weekend!

Like most parents,with a pulse, we, on average,go out, as a couple, once every other month. We usually go to dinner and a movie, or sometimes just one or the other. The warden has been traveling a little more than usual, this year, so "date nights" have been somewhat "non-existent". So, after figuring out how many frequent flier miles he's racked up, I decided that it was time to redeem those babies and book a "kid-free" holiday. Where did we go? Was it warm and tropical? Or was it another attempt at a skiing adventure?

Neither, we went to the WINDY City. Yes, it was a tad chilly, but it was a place we had never been to together. And quite honestly, it was absolutely perfect. We just walked the Magnificent Mile,Rush Street and State Street, went to the Museum of Science and Industry, Navy Pier, and you bet your sweet bippy we ate like little pigs. It was great.

No strollers, no meltdowns, no bedtimes, no "wake" times, no time outs, no repeating myself, no 5 minute showers, no kid menus, it was all about US!!!! Finally. I wish I could say we had great stories to share, but we honestly just relaxed and enjoyed freezing our asses off, just US.

***I know I am going catch some shit for failing to call some old friends of mine, that live nearby,but I hope that they understand that it was just a me and the warden weekend. Thank you also to my p's for watching the little dictator, you have no idea how HUGE that was of you.XOXO

I Made Love to a Milkshake....

No. Not Really. However, after indulging in Chick-fil-a's Peppermint Chocolate Chip Milkshake today, I did have the urge to smoke a cigarette. If you live near a Chick-fil-a,I urge you to go try one of these puppies out. The little dictator, the warden and I sucked that thing down. We were at the mall today, and I noticed that as the holidays are growing near, people's fuses are getting short. But, if we all treated ourselves with a little bit of yummy, it helps take the edge off. So, for one last time, TRY THE FRIGGIN' MILKSHAKE!!!!! You will not be sorry.

My Little Guy was put in "time-out" yesterday @ School!

Great, one more thing to worry about. My behavioral-disordered child. I know that I was being set up yesterday when Ms. Teacher asked,"how do you discipline at home?". I told her the truth, which is we "send him to his room". Which actually, for us, has benefits, "out of sight out of mind". She looked relieved when I said that, because she then followed up with your kid and his little pal were little shits today and they both went to time out. I was wondering why she sighed in relief and then I remembered that this is 2008 and there are parents out their who don't believe in any discipline. I don't know how they do it, but God Bless them. So here's a question, do I need to apologize for his behavior, next time he gets in trouble, or do I just listen to the report and smile? I can't believe this was the first time, he is sent to his room like 3 times a week and I must say "NO!" about a dozen times a day. I guess he's just testing out these ladies, but I am still embarrassed. He must get this naughty behavior from his father's side of the family, because he certainly didn't get it from my side, we are all perfect.

A New Found Pleasure......

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About ten weeks ago, the magician who cares for my hair, Adam, recommended a little "new" show called True Blood. A few weeks after that, a fabulous girlfriend of mine,Erin, concurred with the magician and told me I had to watch it. So after seven weeks of procrastination, I am slowly getting reeled in and I've only watched three episodes, but I can say that I am actually hooked. I never watched Buffy, I've only seen one vampire movie, Lost Boys, and quite honestly I thought vampires were kind of silly. I was so wrong. This show is great. So, thank you Adam and Erin for getting me hooked on something new. And to anyone whose thinking of taking on a new pleasure, check out True Blood on HBO OnDemand, you won't be sorry. FYI: The character Jason is HOT! But, Bill, the vampire is kinda turning me on, too.....

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!!!!!

I am thankful for.....

1. My DVR
2. My Hip Hop Class
3. My munchkin's bedtime
4. Concealer
5. Gossip Girl
6. The new Five Guys by my parents house.
7. Tuesday and Thursday Mornings, when my munchkin is at Preschool.
8. On Demand feature
9. Trashy Magazines
10.Oh, duh? The Warden and the dictator. (A.K.A. my hubby and munchkin)

Happy Turkey Day! Wear you BIG girl dress or comfy sweat suit to stuff your face with all of your favorite foods!
XOXO

Top 5 D-BAGS on TV

That's Douche-Bags for you prudes, out there.

Last night I watched MTV's The Hills and decided I can't take much more of that Spencer. He is so gross. Heidi's not too far behind, but let's just say I just think she's stupid. Anyway, it got me thinking that I really don't like alot of folks on TV. So here's my list of D-BAGS....

1. Spencer Pratt (from The Hills)- he just creeps me out, he looks like a date rapist and his chin pubes really make me ill.

2. Charlie Gibson (ABC News)- Nice pinkie ring (see for yourself).

3. Michael Yo (E!'s Daily 10)-he's a tool.

4. Billy Bush (Access Hollywood)- Yawn.....He's dumb.

5. Katie Couric (CBS News)- Yeah, she's a chick, but who cares?

What about you guys, who do you think is a D-BAG?

Disney Star turned Fabulous (minus rehab).

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I love love love Anne Hathaway. This movie is a great case of how to make in Hollywood, post Disney fame. So what, if her ex was a con-man, this girl can act. And the way this movie was shot, made me like I was actually at the rehearsal dinner, wedding, and reception. It was absolutely beautiful. Though the story was dark, it actually captivated the relationship of this family, in a realistic way. It was refreshing to see that Hollywood acknowledging "real life". The Grade for this flick, A- . The minus is for not marketing this movie more, shame on the studio.

Goodnight Mom.....

I found this in a Parenting magazine today, while I was actually waiting to be seen by Atlanta's GREATEST ENT, Dr. Mark Yanta. I have this obnoxious cough and my ears and sinuses are feeling funky, so I figured I should get it checked out, after 3 weeks of saying it would go away. Moms you know what I am talking about, we are always taking care of others, but never ourselves, blah,blah,blah.... Anyway, this is for anyone who might have read Goodnight Moon one too many times......

Goodnight Mom(with apologies to Margaret Wise Brown)
By Sarah Jio, Parenting

In the messy green
family room
There was a telemarketer ringing the telephone
And a crying toddler
because his brother just popped his
red balloon
And a picture of--

The cow jumping over the moon (which someone colored on with permanent marker)
And there was a missing
teddy bear, and a girl with
gum in her hair

And one to be scolded
And laundry to be folded
And a very hungry spouse
And something stinky in the house
(that no one else seemed to smell)

And a comb and a brush and a colicky baby who just won't shush
And a frazzled mommy screaming #*%#@

Goodnight messy room
Goodnight scribbled-on moon
Goodnight cow getting out while she can
Goodnight telemarketers and the
popped balloon
Goodnight long-gone teddy bear Goodnight cereal bar smeared all over the dining room chair

Goodnight spitup
And goodnight leaky sippy cup
Goodnight much-too-little house and goodnight grumpy spouse
Goodnight comb and goodnight brushAnd goodnight to a certain 4-year-old who just needs to hush right now I mean it

Goodnight Elmo
Goodnight toys we'll pick up tomorrow,
or the next day
Hello chardonnay and TiVo--
"me" time finally

Calling all Nerds! Calling all Nerds!

I am not knocking Nerds, by calling them Nerds. I love all of God's creatures, but I will give a very lucky Nerd a lap dance if one of them could invent a........ Laundry Robot! Please! Please! Please! I am telling you that my latest and greatest enemy is our laundry hamper. If I had the means to have new clothes delivered to my house everyday, I would throw dirty clothes in the trash daily, actually I'd even recycle it (it'd be dirty, but usable). So back to my plea, if you know of someone who is into inventions, tell him or her to make me my Laundry Robot......

One of the funniest parts in Waitress

No, I am not preggers! But, I had to share this clip from Waitress with everyone. It's called "Bad Baby Pie".....(Don't forget to press pause on my kick ass playlist, enjoy.)

If you haven't seen this movie, please rent it or look for it on HBO OnDemand.

Have something cute on,when I get home.

I think the warden has been drinking.

Once again, the warden was out of town this week and the little dictator,our son, was in rare form. Our little guy does well during the week, but on the weekend he is kinda like a binge drinker. You know how during the week most drunks are functioning alcoholics , then on the weekend they act like mean drunks who think its classy to get in fights. That's our Pride and Joy. I am so over it.

Anyway,back to the title of this blog. I just got off the phone with the warden, who is at his BFF's in DC, waiting to watch Tummy Sticks, that's what I call UFC, and we were talking about him coming home tomorrow and he asked me if I was going to have on something cute for his arrival. I said yeah, a two year old. Jackass!

I know he was kidding, but in my noggin I was thinking, WTF? Yes, I am excited that he is coming home, but for different reasons. Before our son, I used to love it when he came home just because I guess, I missed him. Now, my tune has changed a bit. I miss him, but with ulterior motives . I just want him to come home to do shit for me, like help out with bath time, bedtime, etc.. I am starting to feel sorry for him, how shitty is it of me to only want him to come home to do stuff for me? Why do kids make have to make life so different?

I know we make our own choices, but I am starting to feel like once you have kids your own personal choices are no longer personal. It's like,where do we go? And do we ever get to come back? You can't have something cute on when your husband gets home at lunchtime, where will you put your kid? In front of TV? Aren't we supposed to be watching their television intake? Or do we hire a babysitter for 15 minutes? (Girls, let's be honest we know that's all the time they need.) I wish I could figure out a way to blend my former life with my current life and enjoy it more. I am not unhappy with who I have become, but I wish that I could have studied for this part of my life. That way, I could have prepared for it. ( I know that sounds like a control freak.)I feel so over-whelmed sometimes that I actually feel bad for my husband and son, because I selfishly just miss my former self, the woman who never really gave a shit about anything else and probably would have something cute on for her warden.

KID FOR SALE!!

Oh wait, this isn't Craig's List.

I am about to lose it with my little dictator. He has been quite the demon this weekend. And please don't give me that excuse that he is TWO. I can't hear you! LA LA LA LA LA.....

I can't believe that God, himself, programs these little creatures to act like crazy people. Wait a sec, can I say crazy people, is that politically correct?

Not a very eventful weekend, just a lot of holding my breath, telling myself to not react, you know your run of the mill parenting. So back to my ad, Kid For Sale.

Oh never mind, I'll give him one million more chances and then he will be on the auction block, for sure, the little turd.

Congratulations, President-Elect Obama

What a great day in the Obama house. I hear his girls went to school like normal today. Funny,huh? I understand that some folks are kinda mixed about these election results, but if you are a parent, please remember that it is always better to take the high road and support our leaders. Some of us might not have voted for who won, but whomever won deserves our respect and prayers.

Now, enough about the election already, isn't it time we focused on more important matters like Denise Richards is coming back to TV. (My guilty pleasure is coming back to E!). God Bless America......

***Oh, this picture was taken by me @ a Town Hall meeting in GA, earlier this summer. To the left of the Secret Service Agent's BIG head is Obama.***

Top 5 "weird" things I LOVE.

They may be weird for you, but great for me!

1. Taco Bell- OMG! I adore Toxic Smell, as my sissy's boyfriend calls it.
2. Hawaiian Pizza- No one wants to share it with me, because nobody understands.
3. Gossip Girl- I feel like I am all alone with this fabulous TV program.
4. Mild Chicken Wings- Hot ones are GROSS! Who enjoys sweating while they eat?
5. Any NON-Sci-Fi movie. YAWN! They are so corny. Especially ones with Will Smith. I will watch anything else, but if aliens are involved (or Will Smith),Forget it! NERDS!!!!!

How about you? What are some weird things that you love?

How much Halloween candy did you eat?

I took my little Buzz Lightyear trick-or-treating Friday and the little superhero got a ton of candy. Being the careful parent I am, I went through it carefully to make sure that it was safe. Safe meaning, "Is it something mommy would like?". Here is how I check my child's candy (step by step):

Step One- Put child to sleep.
Step Two- Draw all of the curtains.
Step Three- Pour the candy all over counter.
Step Four- Divide treats in to two piles, shitty and yummy.
Step Five- Check on child(make sure he is really asleep).
Step Six- STUFF MY FACE.

I kinda got a tummy ache after my "binge",but damn it was good. I can't wait until the warden comes home,so he can take all of this candy to work. I'll be like 500 lbs. when he comes home.

I feel weird saying this, but I kinda miss the warden (my husband).

I know, I know I never have much to say about my husband, at least anything good or sweet. So, no need to worry that I am going to get mushy, I am however, going to list my Top 5 Married Moments, so far.

1. Our trip to Durango, CO- It was the worst trip of my life. But, despite my inability (or disability) to ski. We have laughed more about that trip than we ever thought possible.

2. Our moonlight bike ride- I must have been drunk when I asked him to get me a bike for Christmas. When I said bike, I meant like a banana seat, beach cruiser,not a mountain bike. WTF was he thinking? He decided to go for a run at like midnight and I thought I would ride a long side of him. Bad idea! My legs were burning so bad that I threw the bike on the ground and started to walk away, he asked me what I was doing and I whipped my helmet at him.

3. The way I told him I was pregnant- I didn't know what to do, he was out of town and I couldn't figure out how to say it. So, I took a camera phone picture of the EPT and sent it to him over the cell phone.

4. The time our parents went to D.C. with us- Yes, I said our parents. My mom and dad and his mom and dad. It was a disaster, but we survived and to this day I can't look at those street signs that count down how much time you have to walk, without hearing my father in law, in his loud and somewhat obnoxious voice counting along with it.5..4..3..2..1. (I am rolling my eyes as you read.)

5. The time we were talking trash to each other about who was cooler and I said "Well, who's the hip hop dancer?"and we both lost it.

I hope you enjoy this entry,as much as I enjoyed remembering these things.

A Dedication to all the Wannabe"Cool" Moms

I often wonder what it would have been like if my mom would have been a little bit looser with me as a kid, but the more I think about it I am actually glad that she was a "normal" mom. At least she wasn't like Regina's mom, whom my sister teases me about all the time. So all you crazy "cool" moms, take a peek at how stupid you look.......


Smooches to my sissy, who tries her damnedest to help me keep it real.

A blast from the past, is a GREAT thing!

Okay, so here's my story. I grew up in a suburb of Chicago called Bolingbrook, or the "Brook". And personally, I loved my childhood/adolescence/young adulthood because of this little town. I tell my husband all the time that I want our son to grow up in a place like I did. So let me get to the point.

A few months ago, one of my oldest,dearest girlfriends from the "Brook" called and insisted on me joining a website called "the Brook", it was like Face Book. So, I did and sure enough all of these memories started flooding back into my head. And I so badly wanted to share them with someone who was there. And unfortunately,my poor husband just didn't get it. It was kind of exciting and weird all at the same time. But, it was also kind of sad because I didn't have anyone to share it with. People I had forgotten about and people who I thought of often were popping up on this site faster than teenagers to a keg. I felt like I should do something about it.

Almost immediately, I got messages and sent messages to a few of my long lost BFF's. These girls were my whole life for years and like most friendships things changed, we got married, had kids, careers, etc. Pretty soon, we had separated. Not in a vicious fight or anything just parted ways. But I can honestly say that every year I think of them on their birthdays and have the fondest memories of our lives that we truly shared. Sure, we might have missed some milestone events, but there is something about our friendship that never got lost.

So Thursday, I got an email from one of my long lost BFF's and she gave me her phone number and before I even finished reading the email I called her. It was like one of those moments where you don't even think about it, you just do it. And I laughed with her and felt like even though I hadn't talked to her in seven years,it didn't matter.

We talked about our current lives, what happened in past seven years, our families, our husbands, this damn website we are all addicted to, and our pasts. I couldn't believe how fun it was to be talking to someone who knew all of my old stories. Funny shit about old boyfriends, who farted in front of me and completely grossed me out, stories about my poor mom having to drive drunk boys home from my old house, the stories were flying out of our mouths like they were just yesterday.(I know that sounds old fashioned.)

I didn't feel weird talking to her, in fact, I felt like it was about time that I had. There was no need to waste any more time thinking that I should call or email. I just did it. And it gave me a chance to remember a lot of funny/good times in my life that no one else would ever know about except my BFF's from way back when. I've made friends since then, don't think I am some loner, but being able to talk to someone who knows the skinny on your past is quite the blessing. So, thanks BFF for making me laugh and reminding me that we had so many good times together and it would be really dumb if we let seven more years go by before we shoot the shit again.

Oh Geeze,my kid has the Squirts!

I have been very fortunate for the past couple of years. My little guy has never been as sick as he has been for the past three days. He has the SQUIRTS! It's gross as an adult to have them, but let me tell you, cleaning up someone else's is worse. I don't give a flip if the mess is my sweet little baby's. It's NASTY. So, here's my question, "Is he sick because of the preschool?". I just recently put him in a two day a week program at the local church and since then we have been to the doctor three times in two months. I used to work at a doctor's office so I know not to stalk my doc for every single thing, but I just can't understand how my sweet healthy toddler has turned into "germ ball"? Yes, I do understand that kids pick their noses, lick their fingers, and rub their eyes, but come on, they get sick on contact. It sucks. And the worse part is once they recover from one thing, its like something else is lingering around the corner. I'll get back to my cleaning. My house smells like the Lysol factory. SQUIRTS SUCK!!!! Oh and a message to all you mother's out there, who still send their kid to school sick because you have to get your hair highlighted or you have tennis, SCREW YOU! It's people like you who spread this funk!

Mamarazzi? Who me?

Yes,my friends,(a la McCain), there is a such a phase in a mom's life when they become a part of a pack of women they never thought they would become a member of and that group is called the "mamarazzi". Today, I was at the pumpkin patch with my ds(dear son) and my dh (damn, oh I meant dear husband) and I had my camera glued to my hands and just kept clicking, as if Britney was shaving her head. I was making myself sick. And then it occurred to me that I was morphing into one of those moms who thinks she is Annie Leibovitz or Herb Ritts. It was funny, but I am without a doubt a member of the "mamarazzi" and I've got a million pictures of my little guy to prove it. Why a million pictures? Who knows? Who really cares? Who knows? One day, when my munchkin is going through all of my stuff,he too, will ask, "Why the f*** are there so many pictures of me with pumpkins?"

"Quit Should-ing All Over Yourself!"

I am a member of a Mother's Group at a local church. (YES, there are churches that exist that accept flawed people, like myself, they are called Catholic churches.) Anywho, last Friday the guest speaker was Dr. Paula Bloom, http://www.paulabloom.com/, and she was fan-fucking-tastic. She talked to us about how, as women/mothers, we have the tendency to should all over ourselves. We should spend: more time with our kids, less time at work, more time in the kitchen, less time in front TV, more time reading to our kids, more time with our husbands, blah, blah, blah... The list is endless. But, instead of should-ing all over ourselves, we should just be true to ourselves and accept that the only people we need to answer to ourselves and God. Our kids and our husbands love us for our flaws. So, I've been thinking about it and have decided that I don't give a shit about what other mother's think is right. My son is a product of me and my husband and it is up to US to provide him with the love and support he needs and if every mother in Atlanta is potty training their kids at 2, good for them. If mom's are growing their kid's hair out like the Jolie-Pitt kids, let them. If all the mommies are trying to look like Sarah Palin, God help them. But as for me and my family we will continue to have our own style. So enough with the should-ing.We don't need any more pressure on ourselves or from our neighbors to be cool, because we are already cool and quite frankly, we've got the looks to back it up,too. HA!

My Top 5 has a NEW member.

Drum Roll, Please........(Don't laugh, but it's....)

Brody Jenner.
He is replacing my longtime top fiver, Edward Burns. Who is still hot, but a family man now, and not in enough magazines to keep me interested. Maybe if he comes out in a good movie or makes a good movie and quits wasting time with his band , I'll reconsider.

Who else thinks that Kendra is dumb?

Bless her heart, she is a MORON! But, for some strange reason it's fascinating. Check this out.......

Who else thinks that this election is over-staying its welcome?

A little something to do when the kids go to bed tonight.....
The Presidential Debate Drinking Game

Football-schmootball, who cares?

I really don't care about football, but I heard football season started. Boo, who cares. But, I must say, the attached video talking about football cracks me up. Enjoy. (Don't forget to, pause my fabulous playlist to hear this one.)

3 Funny things that happened over a long weekend!

Greetings!

Over the weekend a few funny things occurred.

#1 There is a hearing impaired woman who works at our local grocery store, who was laughing at me, while I was rolling my eyes at my little monster, and she proceeded to say that the weekend was almost here. I told her that I would be happy if it was bedtime. She said she knew how I felt because her kids drive her crazy, too. But, then she added that when her kids drive her crazy, all she has to do is take her hearing aids out, so she can have peace and quiet. It was so unexpected and flippin' funny. I loved it!

#2 I was in NYC, Friday, and this really awesome lady, from Australia, and I were talking about seafood and she said that she can't wait to go to Red Lobster. I think I actually choked on my spit and giggled a little. She was so sweet and excited about Red Lobster that I didn't have the heart to tell her that its like a guilty pleasure to looooove that place. We all love those Cheddar Bay biscuits. (You snotty moms, know what I am talkin' about. Don't try to deny it)

#3 That same day,this lovely couple from England tapped me on the shoulder and asked what a fountain drink was.

God Bless our friends from across the pond "they're like martians".

If you get a chance to see any movie on HBO ON DEMAND,see this one.

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This movie is great. I actually wish I saw it in the theater. The best scenes are when she is writing letters to her unborn baby. And when a woman tells her that "no one tells you how it (having kids) really is". Awesome!

Your Sunday Comic

The boys are BACK!

God Bless HBO! I love this show and yes if you have never watched it, go rent it or watch it On Demand. Jeremy Piven is fantastic. And he is a true testimony that plugs do work, and he wears them well. However, plugs are not for everyone... Anyway, remember HBO, Sundays @ 10pm.

Is it me,or are we FRESH out of original ideas?

My husband has been out of town all week, so I have had the TV all to myself. So, I actually got to watch some of my favorites uninterrupted by dumb questions/requests. Gossip Girl was my first priority for the week,while eating Oreos, of course, it was fantastic. But during commercials, I kept seeing ads for the new 90210. Then during the Today show, they were promoting New Kids on the Block. Oh, and I can't forget, I saw that pinch rolling jeans is coming back. We are all guilty of it, ashamed to admit, yes, but unfortunately I, too, was a pincher. All I can wonder is WHY? 90210? NKOTB? Pinches? I mean, get serious. Are we so disconnected with each other that we can't be bothered to arrange some sort of rally and think of something new and fresh to do with our pop culture? I pledge to all fellow Americans that I will not pinch roll my jeans,so help me God. I might dabble in the 90210 and watch the New Kids on the Today show, but that will be it. I vow to go forth and attempt to get out of the time warp I already went through. No deja vus for me. NO WAY!!!

OMG! I AM OFFICIALLY A COUGAR!

I was out of town for a wedding this weekend and I wish I could tell you that some little Abercrombie model hit on me, but I must confess he was a little geek. Think geeky, Anthony Michael Hall in Sixteen Candles. It was the last song of the night and me, my sister,and my sister-in-law were standing there, and bless his little geeky heart, he asked, in his drunken state, "Any of you want to dance?",so I felt bad and said okay. As we danced he asked, what we were doing afterward and if I knew how to two-step. Two-step, WTF? I wanted to laugh so hard, but I maintained my cool, until I saw his BRACES. A mouth full of clear (actually yellow) upper and lower braces. I laughed and when the song was over I realized, I had my first Cougar moment.

Best reason to stay up late!!!

She is so damn funny. Enjoy her and her little nugget @ 11:30 PM on E!. You will love her lingo like, my personal favorite,"SUCK IT HARD"... HA.

When we grow up, do we owe our parents anything?

I know that lately I have been having issues with my parents, actually just my mom, and the more I over analyze it the worse I seem to get. But, I really am starting to feel like she feels that I owe her something. Not money,not time, not even respect, I can't put my finger on it, but I feel like its something. And quite frankly, it bugs the shit out of me. I was talking it over with a friend of mine and she feels the same way about her mom. An example would be, how she wants to come over all of the time, at her convenience. When she asks and I say no,she gets mad,but when I feel bad for saying no all the time and say yes she says little things to my two year old, like "poor thing needs to be around more people besides mommy". Hello, I can hear you... I feel like she thinks that I owe her open access to my adult life, as if I were still living under her roof. Does this make sense? I am trying so hard to remember all of these little things that drive me nuts as an adult,so I don't follow the same path and it really scares me that I will ultimately end up just like her. To make me feel better, does anyone know what I am talking about? When we move out, start our own lives, pay our own bills, and turn in our old key, do we need to clear out our tabs before we spread our wings?

I have turned to mush!

Last night,after a fun early night out with the girls, I came home and found myself watching the Olympics. I tuned in at just the right time because it was almost time to see our little sweetie, Michael Phelps, compete. They did a little background on him and interviewed his mom and she was so proud. As I continued to watch the event, I got a little choked up when he won the gold. I am not a mushy person at all. I didn't cry when we got engaged, when we got married, or even when I had our son, but there was something about this Michael Phelps thing that really got to me. I thought it about it for a minute and realized that the reason why I am so mushy is because of my own little monster. My son might drive me crazy, but I know that one day he is going to work hard for something and I can't wait until I have my moment, like Mrs. Phelps did, when all of his hard work pays off for him. Even President Bush and his family looked like crazy family members rooting for our boy Phelps, it was really great.I hope that my mushiness isn't contagious, I probably caught it from one the moms I went out with yesterday. Gee thanks!

MY NEW ANTHEM (Actually just the title.)

...I believe that the world should revolve around me......(You go little Jackie)...

Does anyone stay up late like a teenager?

The answer is..... Yes, ME!!!!!
Lately, my husband and I have been staying up late like kids do at pajama parties. All week I've been wondering why I the hell I have to stay up and and get my fix of mindless TV, like its crack. And my friends, the answer is so simple. I stay up so late, as it was pointed out by a friend, because after my son goes to sleep the only "me" time I am guaranteed is after 8:30 and I want it to last as long as I can. Because the minute I fall asleep, tomorrow rears it ugly head and its back to reality. Back to my version of Groundhog Day. I love my son so much and his little voice is so cute in the morning when he shouts "Morning Mommy" and if my husbands not home he says "Daddy at work". But, mommies you know that every now and then it is so nice to imagine what it would be like to have nothing to do when you wake up, except watch The Price Is Right in your jammies at 10:30 AM all by your lonesome. Anyway, I will try to go to bed earlier, but I am so afraid to miss my late night line-up of: E!News, Chelsea Lately (My ABSOLUTE FAVORITE), and Sex and the City reruns on TBS. Come to think of it, I'm not going to change a damn thing. Good Night.

Most Convincing reason to have another baby!

The light was shed on me. Oh thank you wise one who asked me today, "You know how your son is up your ass all day long?". I said, "yes". She said, "if you have another one they will be up each others asses all day long". Who knew that it was so simple? She said that they kind of cancel each other out. And that my friends hasn't convinced me to give in, but it is the best reason I have ever heard. Honest and to the point. ** Another great reason for #2: They can take each other to parties, school, or, like the Kardashians, to jail..( I'd do it for my brother and sister, hopefully everyone would.)

Am I being a Snotty Daughter?

I am 32 years old and I feel like my mother is not being fair? I know that that sounds like a teenager, but I think its true. In the past few months I have begun to lose my patience with my mother. I feel like she doesn't quite understand her role in our family anymore. I have been blessed with one sister and one brother and although we are years apart in age, we have found that we have one HUGE common factor, which is OUR MOTHER. My brother has been married and on his own for about 12 years, I have been married and on my own for seven years, and my little sister, God help her, is 24 and in Graduate school,living at home. My mother still treats us like we still live under her roof, and she is taking care of us financially. A little background, my mom was a great mom, strong working mom ( she still works, Thank God), my dad traveled a lot, so she really knew how to take charge, when it was just her. And looking back on my childhood, I feel like she was a better parent when she was in charge than when she had my dad around, when she liked to play victim. My dad was your typical dad, hard working, a little too proud sometimes, but always fair. Needless to say, I wouldn't have changed a thing about my parents, back then. Since then, I have a different attitude toward them and it started when I was about 19. I was in college and my mother still found it necessary for me to tell her everything I was up too. Up until the day I got married, I was 25, she still thought that it was okay to ask me where I was going and who I was going with. Get serious,right? I am being serious. It was ridiculous. I remember I had to go to Philadelphia for a convention, I had been married for two years, and she gave me an attitude about going there for work, she thought I should have stayed at home, or gone there with my husband. I guess she thought I was going there for fun, not work. This is the crazy kind of shit that I've been dealing with since I got married. Now,since I had my son, it has gotten more annoying. My dear husband stayed at home with us, when we had our son, for three weeks. My mom said that she would help me out that first week he went back to work and I thought that that sounded great. It wasn't. I had scheduled a hair appointment that week and when she showed up to "help" me, so I could go to the salon, she said that I wasn't allowed to go by myself and that we (me,her, and the baby) all had to go. What kind of help is that? Her latest stunt is dropping by unannounced. Her favorite times to do this is during dinnertime, nap time, or anytime that, as she says, is convenient for her, because she works. Well the last I checked my husband works similar hours as she does and the last face he wants to see in our home is his mother-in-laws. It's as if she has no respect for my family's needs or our family time. It's all about her and it scares the shit out of me that: 1) I am going to turn into her. 2) It is possibly going to get worse. and 3)It is going to destroy my relationship with both of my parents because they can't seem to recognize her problem. This all breaks my heart because I know that she is a good person, and I know that my dad is really just trying to care for his depressed wife. I know that she has a problem, because my brother and sister see it,too. My brother's better half and my better half see it as well.The only good thing that has come out of this non-sense is that our relationships have grown stronger, we just feel bad that our mother isn't a part of it and quite frankly, she will never be apart of it because of her attitude. Do you think I am acting like a snotty daughter?

My Summertime Guilty Pleasure is...

Denise Richrds:It's Complicated... Love Denise, love her dad, love her dogs, love her new assistant. It is good TV in this summer heat. I've heard it was going to be cancelled, but I hope it won't be. It is fan-fucking-tastic.......Love it.

Should I suck it up and try for #2?

A little background for you. I am a planner. I'm not a fan of surprises. As a matter of fact I have become addicted to my cable system because it gives me preview of whats going to happen on my shows. So this leads me to a BIG ASS question... When should I have another kid? Or should I have another kid?

Look, I love my son, but should I go and muck things up and have another one? He's not the easiest kid to parent, but he sure is cute. I have been going back and forth in my head and out loud sometimes, to people who are willing to listen. Should I do it? It is so exhausting having a little one and now that he is out of the baby phase,he is in toddler phase and it is fun, but do I want to add another baby phase into this picture?

It took me so long to surrender and have the first one. I don't want to wait forever to have a second one, but the more I think about it I wonder if a second one is necessary? I've got a good kid, so far. What if the next one is a nutbag? My current situation is kind of nice, one mouth to feed, one game to play, one set of toys to keep up with, one bootie to clean. I am not a needy person, I am happy with what I have been given. Should I get greedy and ask for more?

I recently read in a book to have another one,so your kid will have someone to talk to about how bad we have screwed them both up. Therefore they will have a someone to bond with for the rest of their lives and never be alone.

I don't know. I guess I'll leave it up to a weak moment with alcohol to make my decision for me. And in the end I'll only have myself to blame.

Top 5 All-American Hotties (in honor of 4th of July)

Image details: The Assassination Of Jesse James By The Coward Robert Ford - Arrivals served by picapp.com

Image details: Celebrities Attend Game 5 of the NBA Finals served by picapp.com

Image details: Celebrities Attend Game 5 Of The NBA Finals served by picapp.com

Image details: "Movies Rock" A Celebration Of Music In Film - Arrivals served by picapp.com

Image details: The Cinema Society Hugo Boss Host A Screening Of "Fracture" - After Party served by picapp.com

The HOTTEST Dad of Three-EVER!!!

Image details: Celebrities Attend The Lakers Game served by picapp.com


I always seem to be griping about things. So today I am feeling pretty good and would like to send props out to all the dads out there. Some of you are actually sweetie pies and some of you aren't, but God love you if you are as fine as David Beckham.....

Ho-Hum, I totally forgot about seeing Sex and the City

So my sissy told me weeks ago to write a review about Sex and the City (SATC) and here I am three weeks later and I am surprised its not on DVD already. Just to give you a little history about moi, I love the show. As a matter of fact, I love it so much that I saw the midnight showing of the, much anticipated, movie on May 30th. The verdict is in and it isn't that great. Like I said before, I love the show. However, the screen version was just all right. Sure the costume design is phenomenal, the city never looked better,but I just didn't feel all warm and fuzzy afterward. Sarah Jessica Parker, Carrie, did a great job with her story, Kristen Davis, Charlotte, did great as well. But, Kim Catrell and Cynthia Nixon,Samantha and Miranda, were not on top of there games. AT ALL. Kim Catrell oozed an attitude, like hurry up and get me off this f'ing set. And Cynthia Nixon didn't seem like she was into it either and unfortunately it showed. There is a positive side to this movie though, which made it worth my $10. And it was making a big deal out of going to see it with one of my dearest friends. She is like me, a stay-at-home mom, who loves SATC and loves before movie drinks, Chocolate Martinis. So if its not on DVD yet, check it out with your girlfriends, or boyfriends, for the clothes, a few good laughs and actually some tears. But bring your barf bag for Miranda's love scene at the end, yuck!
Grade: low C
FYI:Jennifer Hudson is precious in this movie.

I'm blowing the dust off.

It has been a while since I have had a minute to sit and type a blog. I actually had to think of my password. So after blowing the dust off and climbing through some cobwebs, here I am to say that in the last few weeks absolutely nothing has changed. Moms are still moms and kids are still kids. The snotty ones are still out on the loose, the only difference is that they are armed with sunscreen now, hanging out at neighborhood pools, checking out the lifeguards like a bunch of cougars, while swapping stories with other snotty moms who aren't paying attention to their kids. It's such a relief to have a place to talk about these bitches, without having to worry about my son getting black-listed because his mommy can't stand these women. I put up with these women for his sake, but trust me my filter is getting clogged and I am likely to explode soon, so BEWARE. Have a great week everyone!

My Mother's Day Wish

My Mother's Day wish is for a day off. No friggin' kid choppin' at my ankles. No bananas to peel. No boo-boos to kiss. No MELTDOWNS. No "Mommy, Mommy, Mommy". No dirty diapers. No Good Night Moon. No PBS Kids. No bathtime. No cutting up food into tiny pieces. No watching my mouth. No waking up early. (the list is endless)

This is what I want for Mother's Day. NOT A DAMN THING. LEAVE ME ALONE FOR 24 HOURS STRAIGHT!!!! (How cheap is this gift? Its FREE)

Motherhood is 24/7 of non-stop work and all we get is one day of recognition. Puh-leese.

In honor of Mother's Day, I say we all sit back and do NOTHING.

Happy Mother's day to all the moms out there,snotty ones,too....

All Moms Must Find Their Talent (or a hobby).

So I have blogged about my latest and greatest find yet,as a mom, my beloved Hip Hop Class. Yes, I am still at it and recently our little dance group took home platinum ribbons and a trophy for our 2 minute 31 second routine. Who would have thought that all I had to do to get a ribbon and a trophy, after becoming a mom, was to join a Hip Hop dance group? I thought that after carrying a child inside of my body for 35 weeks, would have gotten me, at least, a certificate. It didn't. And my 15 hours of labor, before the doc decided I needed a c-section? You guessed it, NO honorable mention. And of course, I nursed my little munchkin for one WHOLE year. Again, NO RIBBON, NO TROPHY, NOTHING!!! I think that we, all moms, even, the snotty ones, deserve a congressional medal for all of our efforts, our sleepless nights, leaky boobs, episiotomies, c-section scars, endless diapers, endless homework assignments, etc... The duties are infinite.
Since the government won't step in and recognize our efforts, here's my suggestion: Get involved in something that has a beginning and an end. Going to the gym or running doesn't have a championship or recital. I know that being a mother is supposed to be a selfless act and for the most part its actually pretty rewarding, however every now and then its nice to have a little recognition. Since I have found my outlet (Hip Hop class), I am begging all of the other moms to get off the couch, put the chocolates down, blow the dust off of your hidden talents and get moving. If you like to bake, enter a bake off. If you can sing, join a choir or open mic night. If you are athletic, try a triathlon. Anything will do. Who knows, you might get your ribbon or trophy, that is so long overdue. And that ribbon or trophy will symbolize YOU. PLEASE DO IT FOR YOU AND YOU ALONE!!!!

Check it out Ladies.

I was around some fellow moms this weekend and let me tell you something. We all need to watch what we wear. If you are a new mom, check this out. Now you might want to sit down for this. After you have a baby and lets just say you breastfeed, too, your breasts are never going to be the same again. They will shrink and look kind of shriveled. That is the ugly truth. However, with the right bra, right shirts,and right posture, or right surgeon, your knockers will be okay. This weekend though, a "Wannabe" Snotty Mom* had her stretch marked breasts hanging out of the wrong kind of shirt and it alarmed me to think that maybe she has no clue that her breasts aren't who they used to be. So please ladies let's help each other and give each other a signal when the ta-ta's need to be covered. But since the poor soul was a "Wannabe" Snotty Mom, I didn't say a word. I held my tongue. I just let her shriveled up, stretch marked boobies hang out like old water balloons, just because she was who she was.

*"Wannabe" Snotty Mom- a mom who tries to act like she's got it all: the cash,the house, the genius children, but the fact is she doesn't have Shit.

"Keeping up with the Joneses" makes you look stupid!

It has come to my attention that I haven't blogged anything about the poor little souls that must "keep up with the Joneses". So here I am, on a Wednesday afternoon, blogging to remind you that people on television, in the media, or even in your cul-de-sac are not who you are destined to be. We are all put on this earth for a reason and if we continue to think that we are supposed to have everything that everyone else has, we will ultimately disappoint ourselves. I am so tired of meeting new people and all they want to talk about is what material things they want or what their "friends"and neighbors have. Recently, my sister-in-law told me that her niece introduced her friend to her as, "this is my friend *Ashley, from Twin Lakes (her parents neighborhood)". Her niece probably didn't even know Ashley's last name, but she knew what subdivision she lived in. How in the hell did she know this? More than likely it is how her parents define these so called "friends". What are we teaching our kids? Are we teaching them that status is everything and character is nothing? Aren't we a little too old to be comparing our self-worth to other's material possessions? I love the show "Keeping up with the Kardasians", but I know that I am not a Kardasian, so I don't have to keep up with them. There is a movie called "Keeping up with the Steins", once again I know I am not a Stein, so I don't have to keep up with them, either. My point is, and I do have one, we are not put on this earth to be like everyone else, we are put on this earth with our own purposes,so instead of trying to "Keep up with the Joneses" all of the time, how about we embrace ourselves as we are and teach our children that its okay to be themselves, too. We must lead by example. If all that our kids hear us talking about is what so and so has or where they live, how will they ever be able to define who they truly are. I don't know about you , but I would love for my son to be introduced as "this is my friend *Charlie, he is the nicest guy I know, and I think you will think so, too".

An Adult Hip Hop Class saved my Independence.

Although I am almost two years into motherhood, I can honestly say that in the past six to eight months,I have finally begun to feel like myself again. I am still a germaphobe and a schedule nazi, but I feel better about myself today, than I felt about myself before I had my son. Look, I am crazy about my son and feel blessed to be able to spend all day with him, but I was beginning to think that this was it. My life was turing into a one woman show and I felt like I was losing myself, or choosing to give up myself for this amazing little person. Which wouldn't be beneficial to him or my marriage. Then one day I was driving past Rhythm Dance Center(www.rhythmdancecenter.com)and there it read on the sign "Adult Hip Hop". So when my son went down for a nap, I did a google search and did a trial class that evening. It was so great. The music was loud, the lights were dim (Thank God),and it was like being in a dance club or bar only in workout clothes. I remember coming home, to my husband,and being excited about what I had discovered. He thought it was funny, but I think some of the moves actually turned him on. I am not the most talented dancer, but anything is sexy compared to the pregnant waddle or stroller strides I had been doing for the past two years. Needless to say, I have been bitten by the Hip Hop bug and I couldn't be happier. It is truly something of my own, and I hope that other people try something like this to awaken their independence. This class has about 12 moms in it, both working and stay at home, and we are a team. Finally, moms united!!! This is the break through we needed. So many moms are ridiculously competitive, whether, its about, children, homes, cars, nannies, working, stay at home, fat, skinny, husband's salaries,etc., it is worse than you can imagine. It is so high school. But, thankfully this class has actually united very different moms and created an environment that I am proud to be a part of. So thank you Rhythm Dance Center for helping me get my "sexy back". And thank you to the ladies in the class, we are making a positive differnce in each other's lives and we deserve it.

New brood of moms.

All right ladies, I hate to complain about my fellow sisters, but we need to remember that we are adults. Here's what I am talking about. A few weeks ago I was at a gathering for women and the woman sitting next to me asked me a question about the speaker. So, without hesitation, I answered her question and at our table of seven, five of the women simultaneously went "shhhhh". We were not using our outside voices and we were not laughing,either. Here's my thing. You can "Shhh" my kid, if he's being loud and it's inappropriate and he's on your watch, but keep your "shhh"ing to yourself when it's all adults around and its a free lecture. I'm beginning to notice that "snotty moms" aren't the only bitches out there. There is this brood of moms that can't check out of mommy mode for one second. And these are the ones that are really giving moms a bad name. Please moms remember that we are all adults (except for the little Junos out there) and you should keep your "shhh"es to a minimum.

How do you define this picture?

I think it would be safe to say that Hill is el numero uno "Snotty Mom". However, I could be wrong.

Josh Brolin as G.W.Bush- Isn't he a Goonie?

I was reading up on Hollywood stuff and saw that Oliver Stone will have Josh Brolin as G.W. Bush in the movie 'Bush'. Who would've thought that Brandon Walsh would one day be the president? Maybe Mikey, Chunk, Mouth and Sloth could be in his cabinet. And of course Data would be VP. Maybe it will be a spoof. HA!

What is up with YOUNG Hollywood?

Geeze, another youngster gone, by way of DRUGS. Save your "it was an accident" BULL, too.(FYI: Pills don't just end up in your mouth and get swallowed.) If you happen to be a martian, I am talking about 2 year old Matilda's dad, Heath Ledger. That's right people, he was a dad. Just like Britney Spears is a mom, who does drugs, I guess being a celebrity makes it ok to split, or go NUTS, whenever you want because someone else will always be there for "YOUR" kids. It make me so mad that there are so many women and men out there who do everything that they can to have a baby or adopt a baby and their prayers aren't being answered. But, then you have these selfish, self-righteous billionaire maniacs who create beautiful little people and instead of spending time with them or figuring out ways to see them, they abandon them. They would rather see their drug dealers, oh I meant their doctors who prescribe their meds, (they always prescribed) than their kids. Shame on young Hollywood. It is not the paparazzi's fault, or the public who buys the magazines. Each celebrity must take responsibility for their actions. The paparazzi does NOT light the crack pipes, lay out the coke or tear off the labels from your pill bottles(to make you guess what the dosage is). So, leave all of the excuses at the front door. And take responsibility for YOUR actions. If you think your life is so F'ed up and the only way to get through it is to pop pills, snort coke, or shoot up, YOU DON'T DESERVE KIDS and your kids didn't ask for you, either. I normally don't speak for people, but on behalf of moms everywhere, snotty ones, too, try walking in our shoes for one minute and you will see ,what you may consider, an F'ed up life (most of us don't have nannies, assistants, masseuses). If moms reacted to life the way some celebrities do, we would all be crackheads.

Can't wait until Sex And The City hits the BIG (no pun intended) Screen.

Attention:
All Sweet and Sexy Moms and Snotty Moms,too.

Mark your calendars for a well-deserved Girls Night Out.

When? May 30th,2008. (Get your sitters booked and a DD lined up.)

For What? Sex and the City will hit the big screen.

So make it a big deal for yourself. No kids, husbands or EXCUSES. Dust off your Manolos, actually scratch that, go buy yourself something NEW and flattering and who gives a damn if it is on sale. Wear your hair down, get it cut and colored that day, if you want. Please feel beautiful on this great occasion.

Dedicate this night and raise your Cosmos to all of the moms out there , who remember their Carrie, Samantha, Charlotte, or Miranda days and chose to bury them in the past. Too bad for them, but more drinks and laughs for you.

Top 5 Things to do When the Warden is Out of Town

OK, so my dear husband is really a good guy, but I like to call him the warden just for kicks. (Not for any kinky reasons either, pervs.) Anyway, when the warden is away, my top 5 things to do are:

1. Clean- I know, your thinking, what the hell is a princess doing cleaning. But, I will have to confess that when he is gone, it's amazing how clean my house can get and how long it can stay clean. It's a mystery how a handsome clean cut guy can be so messy.

2.Talk on the phone past 9pm- I know I am not a teenager, but its nice to gossip with your girlfriends after the warden's bedtime. For some reason, men think that we sit around all day gossiping and we couldn't possibly have anymore to talk about in the evenings, well they are so wrong.

3.Watch chick flicks- I know all of the lines to Clueless, Mean Girls, Bring It On, etc. Why? Because I can. When he is home, I guess I compromise my remote and end up watching something that we both might like. Gee, I am so nice.

4.Eat cereal for dinner-No wonder my house stays clean, I don't cook. Except for my son and he loves easy things.

5.Shop-Lord, there is nothing like shopping for nothing and coming home, actually bringing it inside (not hiding it in the trunk until he's not looking)and admiring it without the extra set of eyes asking "who's that for?' or"what is that?"

So everyone that is My Top 5 Things to Do When the Warden is Out of Town.

Who else thinks that Baby doll style tops are AWFUL?

So I was shopping the other day, like a good stay at home mom does, (HA!), and was looking for a shirt to wear with jeans, that wasn't a black long sleeve tee, and what did I notice? Everything looked like maternity wear from the 60's. Please, I pray to the fashion gods, like Ralph Lauren, GAP, and Target, please stop all production of these AWFUL baby doll style tops! They are not cool or flattering. And I don't care who you are, no one should wear these. They make single women look preggers, robust women look more robust and beautiful pregnant women look chunky. We are not all supermodels, but we aren't Ugly Betty's either, so please stop wearing these shirts and start accentuating your curves, tastefully, with snugger shirts that hug your body not hide your body.

Admission of my Gulity Pleasures.

So as a mom, time is precious. The best part of my day is 8 pm (bedtime). Last night was awesome. It started with the Amazing Race (Go T.K. And Rachel),followed by the Golden Globe Press Conference (liked that it was an hour, hated no Red Carpet or speeches.)(FYI: No Country for Old Men is a must see.), then at 11 pm I stumbled upon Rock of Love II w/ Brett Michaels on VH1. Reality TV is my guiltiest pleasure and if you like trainwreck TV, please watch Rock of Love II,you will not be sorry. Skip the Scott Baio show it isn't good ( it sucks). Before I had baby, I used to watch TV, but now I feel like I am one with the damn thing. Who knew that all of my parents money, that was spent on education, would turn me into a moron with a remote? It is fun though, and I know that I am not alone I know alot of my fellow "non-Snotty"moms watch the same things and it makes excellent conversation because it gives us an outlet to talk about things other than the kids. Guilty Pleasures ROCK!!!!

Welcome to my Blog

This is my very first BLOG attempt. And in case you are wondering, I am not a snotty mom. However, as a 20 month old's mom, I can confirm that 1 out of 10 new moms are what I like to call "snotty moms". You know what I am talking about,those moms who "know" that their child is so beyond the rest of the "common kids", that they truly believe that their little one is, not only, baby GAP's next top model, but Jeopardy's next champion. All the while, their little savants, at two years old, are sucking on their pacifiers while reading Latin and playing the cello. These "snotty moms" are everywhere. Don't let them bother you. And don't think that "snotty moms" have a certain look either. They don't all wear the same clothes, typical mom uniform (dark solid knit shirt, dark blue jeans, with little low profile New Balances.), they do , however, have the same old story that their child "never did that" or "doesn't say that". Unlike the "snotty girls "in high school, these women are not always pretty, they are just bitter and their husbands arm them with credit cards, probably to shut them up. Just so you know, I am having fun sorting out these women amongst my son's social circle and so far so good, we are "snotty free". Do not think that you have to befriend every mom out there, keep your circle clear of "snotty moms", because unfortunately "snotty kids" aren't too far away.