Am I being a Snotty Daughter?

I am 32 years old and I feel like my mother is not being fair? I know that that sounds like a teenager, but I think its true. In the past few months I have begun to lose my patience with my mother. I feel like she doesn't quite understand her role in our family anymore. I have been blessed with one sister and one brother and although we are years apart in age, we have found that we have one HUGE common factor, which is OUR MOTHER. My brother has been married and on his own for about 12 years, I have been married and on my own for seven years, and my little sister, God help her, is 24 and in Graduate school,living at home. My mother still treats us like we still live under her roof, and she is taking care of us financially. A little background, my mom was a great mom, strong working mom ( she still works, Thank God), my dad traveled a lot, so she really knew how to take charge, when it was just her. And looking back on my childhood, I feel like she was a better parent when she was in charge than when she had my dad around, when she liked to play victim. My dad was your typical dad, hard working, a little too proud sometimes, but always fair. Needless to say, I wouldn't have changed a thing about my parents, back then. Since then, I have a different attitude toward them and it started when I was about 19. I was in college and my mother still found it necessary for me to tell her everything I was up too. Up until the day I got married, I was 25, she still thought that it was okay to ask me where I was going and who I was going with. Get serious,right? I am being serious. It was ridiculous. I remember I had to go to Philadelphia for a convention, I had been married for two years, and she gave me an attitude about going there for work, she thought I should have stayed at home, or gone there with my husband. I guess she thought I was going there for fun, not work. This is the crazy kind of shit that I've been dealing with since I got married. Now,since I had my son, it has gotten more annoying. My dear husband stayed at home with us, when we had our son, for three weeks. My mom said that she would help me out that first week he went back to work and I thought that that sounded great. It wasn't. I had scheduled a hair appointment that week and when she showed up to "help" me, so I could go to the salon, she said that I wasn't allowed to go by myself and that we (me,her, and the baby) all had to go. What kind of help is that? Her latest stunt is dropping by unannounced. Her favorite times to do this is during dinnertime, nap time, or anytime that, as she says, is convenient for her, because she works. Well the last I checked my husband works similar hours as she does and the last face he wants to see in our home is his mother-in-laws. It's as if she has no respect for my family's needs or our family time. It's all about her and it scares the shit out of me that: 1) I am going to turn into her. 2) It is possibly going to get worse. and 3)It is going to destroy my relationship with both of my parents because they can't seem to recognize her problem. This all breaks my heart because I know that she is a good person, and I know that my dad is really just trying to care for his depressed wife. I know that she has a problem, because my brother and sister see it,too. My brother's better half and my better half see it as well.The only good thing that has come out of this non-sense is that our relationships have grown stronger, we just feel bad that our mother isn't a part of it and quite frankly, she will never be apart of it because of her attitude. Do you think I am acting like a snotty daughter?