All Moms Must Find Their Talent (or a hobby).

So I have blogged about my latest and greatest find yet,as a mom, my beloved Hip Hop Class. Yes, I am still at it and recently our little dance group took home platinum ribbons and a trophy for our 2 minute 31 second routine. Who would have thought that all I had to do to get a ribbon and a trophy, after becoming a mom, was to join a Hip Hop dance group? I thought that after carrying a child inside of my body for 35 weeks, would have gotten me, at least, a certificate. It didn't. And my 15 hours of labor, before the doc decided I needed a c-section? You guessed it, NO honorable mention. And of course, I nursed my little munchkin for one WHOLE year. Again, NO RIBBON, NO TROPHY, NOTHING!!! I think that we, all moms, even, the snotty ones, deserve a congressional medal for all of our efforts, our sleepless nights, leaky boobs, episiotomies, c-section scars, endless diapers, endless homework assignments, etc... The duties are infinite.
Since the government won't step in and recognize our efforts, here's my suggestion: Get involved in something that has a beginning and an end. Going to the gym or running doesn't have a championship or recital. I know that being a mother is supposed to be a selfless act and for the most part its actually pretty rewarding, however every now and then its nice to have a little recognition. Since I have found my outlet (Hip Hop class), I am begging all of the other moms to get off the couch, put the chocolates down, blow the dust off of your hidden talents and get moving. If you like to bake, enter a bake off. If you can sing, join a choir or open mic night. If you are athletic, try a triathlon. Anything will do. Who knows, you might get your ribbon or trophy, that is so long overdue. And that ribbon or trophy will symbolize YOU. PLEASE DO IT FOR YOU AND YOU ALONE!!!!

Check it out Ladies.

I was around some fellow moms this weekend and let me tell you something. We all need to watch what we wear. If you are a new mom, check this out. Now you might want to sit down for this. After you have a baby and lets just say you breastfeed, too, your breasts are never going to be the same again. They will shrink and look kind of shriveled. That is the ugly truth. However, with the right bra, right shirts,and right posture, or right surgeon, your knockers will be okay. This weekend though, a "Wannabe" Snotty Mom* had her stretch marked breasts hanging out of the wrong kind of shirt and it alarmed me to think that maybe she has no clue that her breasts aren't who they used to be. So please ladies let's help each other and give each other a signal when the ta-ta's need to be covered. But since the poor soul was a "Wannabe" Snotty Mom, I didn't say a word. I held my tongue. I just let her shriveled up, stretch marked boobies hang out like old water balloons, just because she was who she was.

*"Wannabe" Snotty Mom- a mom who tries to act like she's got it all: the cash,the house, the genius children, but the fact is she doesn't have Shit.

"Keeping up with the Joneses" makes you look stupid!

It has come to my attention that I haven't blogged anything about the poor little souls that must "keep up with the Joneses". So here I am, on a Wednesday afternoon, blogging to remind you that people on television, in the media, or even in your cul-de-sac are not who you are destined to be. We are all put on this earth for a reason and if we continue to think that we are supposed to have everything that everyone else has, we will ultimately disappoint ourselves. I am so tired of meeting new people and all they want to talk about is what material things they want or what their "friends"and neighbors have. Recently, my sister-in-law told me that her niece introduced her friend to her as, "this is my friend *Ashley, from Twin Lakes (her parents neighborhood)". Her niece probably didn't even know Ashley's last name, but she knew what subdivision she lived in. How in the hell did she know this? More than likely it is how her parents define these so called "friends". What are we teaching our kids? Are we teaching them that status is everything and character is nothing? Aren't we a little too old to be comparing our self-worth to other's material possessions? I love the show "Keeping up with the Kardasians", but I know that I am not a Kardasian, so I don't have to keep up with them. There is a movie called "Keeping up with the Steins", once again I know I am not a Stein, so I don't have to keep up with them, either. My point is, and I do have one, we are not put on this earth to be like everyone else, we are put on this earth with our own purposes,so instead of trying to "Keep up with the Joneses" all of the time, how about we embrace ourselves as we are and teach our children that its okay to be themselves, too. We must lead by example. If all that our kids hear us talking about is what so and so has or where they live, how will they ever be able to define who they truly are. I don't know about you , but I would love for my son to be introduced as "this is my friend *Charlie, he is the nicest guy I know, and I think you will think so, too".

An Adult Hip Hop Class saved my Independence.

Although I am almost two years into motherhood, I can honestly say that in the past six to eight months,I have finally begun to feel like myself again. I am still a germaphobe and a schedule nazi, but I feel better about myself today, than I felt about myself before I had my son. Look, I am crazy about my son and feel blessed to be able to spend all day with him, but I was beginning to think that this was it. My life was turing into a one woman show and I felt like I was losing myself, or choosing to give up myself for this amazing little person. Which wouldn't be beneficial to him or my marriage. Then one day I was driving past Rhythm Dance Center(www.rhythmdancecenter.com)and there it read on the sign "Adult Hip Hop". So when my son went down for a nap, I did a google search and did a trial class that evening. It was so great. The music was loud, the lights were dim (Thank God),and it was like being in a dance club or bar only in workout clothes. I remember coming home, to my husband,and being excited about what I had discovered. He thought it was funny, but I think some of the moves actually turned him on. I am not the most talented dancer, but anything is sexy compared to the pregnant waddle or stroller strides I had been doing for the past two years. Needless to say, I have been bitten by the Hip Hop bug and I couldn't be happier. It is truly something of my own, and I hope that other people try something like this to awaken their independence. This class has about 12 moms in it, both working and stay at home, and we are a team. Finally, moms united!!! This is the break through we needed. So many moms are ridiculously competitive, whether, its about, children, homes, cars, nannies, working, stay at home, fat, skinny, husband's salaries,etc., it is worse than you can imagine. It is so high school. But, thankfully this class has actually united very different moms and created an environment that I am proud to be a part of. So thank you Rhythm Dance Center for helping me get my "sexy back". And thank you to the ladies in the class, we are making a positive differnce in each other's lives and we deserve it.

New brood of moms.

All right ladies, I hate to complain about my fellow sisters, but we need to remember that we are adults. Here's what I am talking about. A few weeks ago I was at a gathering for women and the woman sitting next to me asked me a question about the speaker. So, without hesitation, I answered her question and at our table of seven, five of the women simultaneously went "shhhhh". We were not using our outside voices and we were not laughing,either. Here's my thing. You can "Shhh" my kid, if he's being loud and it's inappropriate and he's on your watch, but keep your "shhh"ing to yourself when it's all adults around and its a free lecture. I'm beginning to notice that "snotty moms" aren't the only bitches out there. There is this brood of moms that can't check out of mommy mode for one second. And these are the ones that are really giving moms a bad name. Please moms remember that we are all adults (except for the little Junos out there) and you should keep your "shhh"es to a minimum.

How do you define this picture?

I think it would be safe to say that Hill is el numero uno "Snotty Mom". However, I could be wrong.

Josh Brolin as G.W.Bush- Isn't he a Goonie?

I was reading up on Hollywood stuff and saw that Oliver Stone will have Josh Brolin as G.W. Bush in the movie 'Bush'. Who would've thought that Brandon Walsh would one day be the president? Maybe Mikey, Chunk, Mouth and Sloth could be in his cabinet. And of course Data would be VP. Maybe it will be a spoof. HA!