I took my little Buzz Lightyear trick-or-treating Friday and the little superhero got a ton of candy. Being the careful parent I am, I went through it carefully to make sure that it was safe. Safe meaning, "Is it something mommy would like?". Here is how I check my child's candy (step by step):
Step One- Put child to sleep.
Step Two- Draw all of the curtains.
Step Three- Pour the candy all over counter.
Step Four- Divide treats in to two piles, shitty and yummy.
Step Five- Check on child(make sure he is really asleep).
Step Six- STUFF MY FACE.
I kinda got a tummy ache after my "binge",but damn it was good. I can't wait until the warden comes home,so he can take all of this candy to work. I'll be like 500 lbs. when he comes home.
So true! I eat it every time I walk by it! Tomorrow it is going in the garbage. My kid has become a junkie. She wakes up asking about CANDY and counts down the minute until she can get her fix.
ReplyDeleteI didn't dress up. Lori was pissed at her son so she went as a drunk mom armed with a plastic cup full of wine !!
Haha! That's almost as good as going to taco bell!
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